Doubt and tell

I have finally been able to calm down as much as I can after the latest incident. I have had dinner with JMercury and his mother, who is, not by chance, my honorary mother, and she has given me some insight about all this... situation.

She has suggested that the healthiest thing to do in this situation would be for Nemesis to tell the Viking. It's making this issue way more complicated, and it's going to be messy in the end. Things should be told right from the start, as history has taught us.


Of course, as the scared idiot I am, I suggested that might not be a good idea; why should he suffer for the doubts Nemesis is having?

And of course again, reason does rise above our fears: we're all suffering already from this. Why should we (Nemesis and I) be acting like children doing something wrong? The doubt IS real, after all. Is she going to be able to make a decision while acting in front of the Viking (and some others) as if this wasn't happening? If she chooses me, is she going to be able to tell the Viking that she has been thinking about it for weeks, months? Isn't their relationship already getting hurt by this?

In a nutshell: "Right. We're doing it wrong". The Viking doesn't deserve to be in the dark. We all deserve to be loved fully and without doubts. This is the purpose of all of this, right?

How could I tell Nemesis to do this? I suggested it once, but it IS her decision. I could email the Viking and suggest a Gentlemen's agreement on this. At least things would be clearer for everyone...

One day later, talking to Nemesis, she told me she thinks the same thing. She just has to figure out the how and the when. She's scared that the Viking will freak out.

I don't want her relationship to be more affected by this than it should. I hope the Viking will understand that this, painful as it is, is for the best. I hope Nemesis won't be heartbroken again. I hope this won't end up in a rushed decision, and I trust Nemesis to do the right thing; I know she sometimes struggles to do what it's right, but I also know she really wants to. She's just scared, sometimes. Aren't we all?


"Hoping and wishing will do us no good. If we cannot act on our hopes, fight our fears, and allow us to do the unexpected, we're not worthy of being happy."